Breakup - I May Be a Fighter but I'm Not a Fool

If you've already had the "talk" with your drifting boyfriend/girlfriend, husband/wife, or your Ex about wanting to save your relationship, you'll need to read on to find out why you may be making some critical mistakes.

It's important to know the temperature of where you really are in your ability to influence your partner. Being a fighter is a good quality that is until it causes you to become a fool.

When you begin to make foolish decisions that will cause your partner to disconnect even further from you, you'll either get nasty or you'll try to appease.

Either of these choices won't get you what you want. You want a quality relationship with someone who can truly be committed.

When my husband wanted out, I became painfully foolish, enough to cause me to be on the verge of losing myself. I told him that I would fight for him and our family no matter what.

Does that sound familiar? Making an announcement like this will trigger your partner to begin an even greater disconnect from you.

Because healthy relationships are built when both parties are equals. If you're not on the same team, you can't win.

You can get on the same team as your partner by behaving exactly like him/her. When this happens, you'll start to agree with his/her position of your failing relationship.

You're thinking in your mind that this will cause you to lose even more. You may not want to let go but you'll be forced to and disgraced if you continue to announce that you're the fighter.

Getting on the same team will give you the advantage of actually looking like someone who has self respect. When you acknowledge your partners position, he/she will begin to respect you.

People like people who agree with them. Even if you're feeling the extreme opposite, it's wise to pull with your partner instead of against his/her decision.

Create the illusion that you're OK, then pull away. This technique will give your relationship room to breathe and your partner time to think about why you don't seem to be bothered that he/she wants to leave.

Do you know what it will do to your partner if you act as if he/she wanting to leave doesn't bother you? Your partner will clearly see that you won't lower yourself to being a foolish beggar and will give him/her more than enough to think about.


Nicole Gayle is the Author of the e-book, What to Do When Your Partner Wants Out, - a guide to help you make your breakup work for you. Learn the secrets to becoming more attractive, happier, and secure. http://www.whenyourpartnerwantsout.com for an instant download now.