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How to emotionally divorce your EX or drifting partner

Attachments are usually formed when there are positive emotions between two lovers but when a relationship is in crisis or a partner has left, it is important to know how to cope with negative emotions.

The best coping strategy is counterintuitive. Your emotions will want to hold on inspite of what you may hear or see. Faced with the truth, you may try to protect "what you have" by reacting from panic but this rarely works. Reacting from shock and panic will cause you to lose your power.

The news of someone leaving or the sight of a drifting partner will cause an imbalance of power in the relationship. Power imbalances in relationships are unhealthy and can only lead to dysfunction.

When you choose to emotionally divorce your EX or drifting partner you cut him/her off from your emotions so that you do not keep bleeding. If you keep the attachment, you are holding onto a fantasy which will only cause you more pain because of unmet needs. More than likely you are holding your partner responsible for your happiness and no one can make you happy but YOU.

Begin by setting up boundaries for yourself and cut yourself off from the dead energy that is causing you so much pain. When I decided to also emotionally check out, I just did not care anymore and this attitude helped me a great deal to becoming the best woman I have ever been. I thought I had true love but I did not. True love is the ability to love yourself enough to not settle for someone who does not deserve you.

Nicole Gayle is the author of the ebook, "What to Do When Your Partner Wants Out." Get it now at

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